Reflections on 2020

Surely many of us start this year toasting to the new decade, excited and full of hope. This was to be ‘our time’, full of promise and potential. Well, that certainly didn’t work as expected!

And so, when for many of us everything has been closed or is only available with limited and restricted access, it’s over for us. Not unlike a layoff, an unexpected breakup of a relationship, a serious health situation that occurs. Those situations where your only option is how you handle what comes your way.

What are your reflections on this year?

Priorities

In early 2020, I guess many of us measure success in terms of results, accolades, promotions, earnings. Yes, even now, winning and achieving are still important, but they have less meaning as other things have gained prominence in our lives.

During a year in which we have been mostly discouraged from leaving our homes, there have been very limited options to work, shop and socialize outside of our homes. Much has been transferred online. Taking the time to stop and smell the coffee when we have been restricted to our four walls has meant that we are unable to do anything or find alternative ways to live well. It has led us to look at our lives in different ways.

For many our priorities have been modified. Valuing the relationships we have, our health and the health of those close to us, the human contacts we have, the importance of our homes have taken the place of things that we perhaps previously valued most.

Happiness

As we reflect on 2020, we may discover that many of the things that used to make us happy are less important. Spending a day shopping may have been a delight once, but it’s not so pleasurable when the practicalities mean going it alone, no browsing or trying on, one-way systems in stores and only being offered one shoe to try on.

Other things have been found to bring more joy and pleasure to life. Sharing recipes and baking, seeing family and friends, walking in the countryside or on the beach are things that now feel meaningful and spiritual, grounding and fulfilling.

Relations

Our relationships have been subject to serious scrutiny this year as we live much closer than we ever anticipated. Valuing our nearest and dearest has been a top priority, though some relationships have become swamped due to a lack of space, patience, and privacy.

It has not been an easy time, with new ways of navigating coexistence and finding ways to respect the need to work, play and have quiet personal time, while trying to be mindful and supportive should dark times arise.

For those of us unable to see our children, grandchildren, vulnerable family members, the elderly, or those with underlying health conditions, these months have been especially trying.

We have discovered who our real friends are, the people who have kept in touch through phone calls, zoom or thoughtful cards. Neighbors and local support groups have been greatly appreciated, keeping in touch and delivering food to those who have been struggling or in need.

work and money

Many of us have found that even though we have been earning much less, our finances have been made easier by our inability to spend as usual. With no lazy shopping sprees, meals out, or holidays, we’ve been able to cut back. Finding ways to reduce spending has been an eye-opener.

Work for some has been problematic, accommodating working from home alongside children and family members, along with fears about what the future holds. Certainly staying afloat has been the immediate concern, rather than striving for promotion, even though some companies have prospered by being in the right niche or by adopting a flexible business approach.

Perhaps we have realized that our fast-paced job is less attractive than it once was and that working from home is a less stressful and more comfortable way to work. A survey found that the 9/10 who have worked from home during the lockdown would like to continue to do so.

Also, many of us may have found alternative ways to get what we need, trading surplus food with neighbors or doing favors for each other rather than hiring someone else to do those jobs.

Personal time

Mental health has been in the spotlight this year, due to the huge impact of the events. We have all had occasion to reflect on our lives, our future, things of value to us. Having some personal time away from these thoughts has been important, especially for those cooped up together in busy share houses.

Setting aside time to exercise, to go for a walk, run or bike ride in nature, has been a lifesaver for many. Or making time to read, enjoy a quiet bath, pursue a hobby, do something creative has made baking especially popular, as has revisiting hobbies such as painting, gardening, and creative interests.

Escapism and a break from home and other people have been important in providing space and time away from the brooding, overwhelm and stress of these uncertain times.

Gratitude

Being grateful for things that we have never really reflected on has been a very special result of this year. Our healthcare providers, farmers, food vendors, teachers, delivery men, even the weather, the special people in our lives, our pets. And also respecting ourselves, our resilience, resourcefulness, and ability to stay positive (in general!) and move on.

What a year it has been!