Challenges of modern parenting

Families are the building blocks of society, and raising children is a blessed privilege, but also a great responsibility. In today’s consumer-oriented, lawless, and sexually permissive world, parenting has become a challenge. Too much exposure to audio and visual media from a young age, coupled with ineffective parenting, has made children selfish, self-indulgent, and seeking instant gratification. They are given to impulsive behavior and are easily frustrated.

Because the family is a training ground for preparing children to take their place in society as responsible adults, parents must periodically assess their styles of functioning. They must have a progressive outlook while adhering to old world values. Child-rearing principles are changing as the world changes, and parenting roles will also change as the child grows. From disciplinarians they become mentors and friends. It is good to have in the middle the biblical adage:

“Instruct the child in the path he should follow, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6.

No one can claim to be a perfect parent. It is through trial and error that one learns how best to mold a child’s character, depending on her personality. Love, patience, and negotiation skills form the basis of good parenting. Teaching respect, responsibility, and resourcefulness should be the goal.

Parental love is instinctive and must be unconditional. It is best expressed in the way a child is brought up. Patients should not be ashamed to show emotions. A child is never too old to be hugged. Open affection between husband and wife is the most reassuring for the child. He will have the confidence that he is safe and secure in her love and that they are always available to guide him. Good communication between parents and children favors union. Only when there is a healthy relationship between them can discipline be instilled.

Discipline is for the positive good of the child. Guarendi says, “Discipline is one of the most loving and enduring gifts a parent can give a child.” A child needs limits and discipline teaches him to respect authority. Obedience should be expected at all times. Praise for good behavior is important. But he must also be taught to accept ‘No’ for an answer. Discipline provides a structure for emotional and social growth. Learn to live by the family code of ethics and develop self-confidence and responsibility for his actions. However, discipline must be consistent. Correction should be done positively and not with punitive measures. One must be kind but firm in enforcing the rules. The child should know that discipline is like “a garland to adorn his head and a chain to adorn his neck.” (Proverbs 1:7-9)

Overindulgence and pampering can stunt a child’s personality. It will rob you of your problem solving skills. It will destroy motivation and make you lazy. There are many reasons why parents become overly lenient. Both parents may be working and feel guilty for not spending enough time with their child. They may be divorced and compensate by giving you too many liberties. They may be anxious parents who want to be overprotective of their child. So they give in to their whims and demands. Some parents find a way to meet their own needs through their child. Helicopter parents don’t allow their child to grow up and make their own decisions.

Permissive parents, on the other hand, let their child do what they like. They are not directive or demanding. Anything the child does is fine with them. Parents are so wrapped up in their own lives that they don’t have time to play an active role in their children’s lives. Such a child is insecure and lacks direction. He knows that his parents won’t care about what he does. There are no guidelines or limits. Such a child is confused, makes wrong decisions and will fall into crime.

At the other extreme are authoritarian parents who are control freaks and impose strict rules that must be followed. They are critical of everything the child does. They destroy their self-esteem by making derogatory comments. There is never a word of praise. Threats and punitive measures are inflicted for minor offenses. As a result, the boy becomes a nervous wreck, living under a cloud of fear. But as an adult he can develop an antisocial personality that leads him to frequent brushes with the law.

Because “children are an inheritance from the Lord” (Psalm 127:3) the authority of the parents must be united and coherent. Parents cannot make conflicting demands. They need to be good role models, and the home should provide a loving, caring, and nurturing environment. They must speak freely about their faith and their relationship with God. Moral values ​​must be instilled in the child. “The way to raise a moral child is to be a moral person,” says David Elkand.